Collaborative Estate Planning (CEP)
How to Prevent a Family War: A Blueprint for Intergenerational Family Harmony
This article is intended to provide a “very different” approach to what everyone calls Estate Planning.
Let’s face it! No one enjoys this topic since it considers our innermost fears—our ultimate demise.
No one likes putting together their Last Will and Testament and Power of Attorney Documents for Care and Property. Everyone, including myself, would rather go out for a nice dinner, take a vacation, enjoy a massage, play a round of golf, or watch a play or a favourite sporting event. However, as we all know, there are only two certainties in life: death and taxes. I have spent many years studying estate planning, and more recently, exploring various estate planning legal cases which have gone terribly wrong.
The title listed above was developed after careful consideration, discussions with leading CEP professionals, and listening to multiple family horror stories about what happens when our estate plans go awry.
Speaking from the standpoint of someone who has experienced family conflict, I want to share my vision of what I believe to be a “blueprint for intergenerational family harmony”—a proposed guide on “how to prevent a family war.”
In the upcoming year, I wish to roll out various modules on Estate Planning (EP) that will cover key topics, including:
- The Role of the Executor
- The Family Cottage/Ski Chalet/Special Family Gathering Place
- The Family Business
- Estate Planning for Blended Families
However, this newsletter is meant to discuss a new approach to EP that focuses on maintaining family harmony while at the same time honouring the wishes of the testator.
What is Collaborative Estate Planning (CEP)?
CEP begins with the end in mind. The end is defined as the successful achievement and fulfillment of the family’s intergenerational wealth transfer that is done through mutual respect, harmony, and transparency. CEP aims to nurture, preserve, and protect not only the family’s financial position but also the family itself for generations to come.
We all know that families are complex organizations. Weddings and funerals are two examples that can bring about the best and the worst in families.
Did you know that in 2024, an estimated 2,000,000 Canadians were widowed, and for many of these individuals, the practical task of dealing with the death of a loved one became a new and often overwhelming reality? Add personal grief to this equation, and this makes for a perfect storm.
Why Should We Consider CEP?
I believe we can all agree that we cannot take it with us when we are gone. The parent’s ultimate wish is that the family carry on in a loving, supportive and caring relationship with one another. It will assist in providing a process for honest and transparent disclosure of Gen 1’s intentions to Gen 2 and Gen 3. It will provide for a better understanding of the “spirit” versus the “letter” of the law of the documents we are creating. It attempts to remove and resolve any family issues that are present either on or below the surface, in advance. It finally adds a “reason why” to the donor’s ultimate disposition plans.
The Family Meeting: The Central Missing Piece in Estate Plans
All too often, we begrudgingly create our estate planning documents, seldom read them, rarely revisit them, and simply file them away. In many cases we often forget where we even stored them. We do not communicate to our loved ones where these documents are kept. If the documents cannot be found at the time of death, the individual is considered to have died intestate (without a Will). Consequently, the family must go to court, and an Estate Administrator will be appointed to settle the estate. Should the Will be located, we rarely share these documents with the family, have them read them and have them understand what the documents are all about!
As a result, I am urging that families consider holding a formal family meeting to review, discuss and help families understand the testator’s final wishes.
We will be holding numerous CEP webinars in the upcoming year(s) to explore the costs of hosting versus not hosting such meetings. We will explore the financial and non-financial costs of holding such meetings. We will provide suggestions as to how to structure them to obtain the most productive outcomes. We encourage all to participate since this is one show that none of us are escaping! Should you not be able to attend, please feel free to reach out to me directly at
David T Yurich, CFP, TEP, CEA, CLU, RFP
Estate Planning and Tax Lead
This publication is for informational purposes only and shall not be construed to constitute any form of advice. The views expressed are those of the author alone. Opinions expressed are as of the date of this publication and are subject to change without notice and information has been compiled from sources believed to be reliable. This publication has been prepared for general circulation and without regard to the individual financial circumstances and objectives of persons who receive it. You should not act or rely on the information without seeking the advice of the appropriate professional.
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